Saturday, 9 May 2015

There's always a way

I hesitate to inflict more of my medical history on you, but my need to boast about my latest  ingenious achievement leaves me no alternative.

The wound on my shin inflicted last September took five months to heal; it was complicated by accompanying cellulitis. The residual redness and flaky skin has now been diagnosed as some kind of eczema necessitating the knee length compression stockings previously mentioned.*  I also have to daub the area with Epaderm (an emollient). That is enough of the medical stuff which I do not want to discuss further.

The Epaderm comes in a weighty (500g) plastic tub. I hope to set off on another backpack on the 19th of this month and do not want to carry that. It is not sold in smaller amounts.

My current tube of toothpaste has just finished. I cut off the bottom, cleaned it out and stuffed it with Epaderm. I then folded the bottom edge back on itself and stapled it closed then put insulation tape round the bottom to protect myself from possible staple lacerations and to complete the seal, et voilà.

To avoid brushing my teeth with gungy ointment, I attached a label.


* The stockings are not worn at night. I thought I was doing ok with the difficult task of donning them in the morning having developed a good technique, then the last medic I saw told me I should do this whilst still in bed, before the blood rushes down the leg !  That task is at the limits of my body's pliability. I am hoping that my aforementioned ingenuity will develop an easier technique. 




11 comments:

gimmer said...

I see 'no comments' - yet
there really can be 'no comment' on that tale -
I hope it does not end in tears (cut type).
Walked up a volcano (extinct) today - good 'Scotland-like' area in the Massif Central, 1000M metres higher than your recent hills: worth a more prolonged study.

The Crow said...

That's a clever adaptation, Conrad.

AlanR said...

Take up yoga!.

Sir Hugh said...

gimmer - Could be both meanings. I had a hernia many years ago. don't want another. Dammit, I should just request my medical history from my GP and publish the whole thing. It would probably rival Proust for length.

----------------

The Crow - That's what I wanted hear Martha. Thanks.

-----------------

AlanR - I tried that some time ago. I was the only male in a group of about thirty aged ladies in the Women's Institute hall. After a couple of weeks the instructor introduced the technique of supposedly tuneful humming to accompany relaxation exercises. My singing is worse than squeaky chalk on a blackboard, and so I was not fooled by her flattery when she said "Oh! it's nice to hear a man's voice amongst the ladies".

That was the last time I went.

bowlandclimber said...

I can see why you don't want to carry the tub, the toothpaste tube seems OK but I can imagine some disastrous leakage from the wrong end.
Years ago I bought some tubes which you could fill [jam etc] at the open blunt end and then firmly seal with a close peg type device. They were available from camping shops.
?worth a look.

Roderick Robinson said...

Subtle sexism: "the only male in a group of about thirty aged ladies." As if being male automatically made you younger. Hey, you're the one that arrives preceded by a medical progress chart.

The bed contortions may be part of the treatment.

Sir Hugh said...

BowlandClimber - Perhaps I am subconsciously laying the material for an interesting disaster post during my trip?

I once had a pot of yoghurt burst open in the saddle bag on a bike trip - the bag was never the same again.

----------------

RR - Well it was about fifteen years ago so I would only be a youthful 60 then and probably marginally younger than the average of the females.

Last night, thinking about donning the stockings in the morning, and wanting to get an early start, I kept them on in bed. I reckon some afflictions work like a chain reaction - I could end up with a dislocated spine.

gimmer said...

that is deemed to be very unwise - i don't know why but that's the advice - not to be confused with using the white ones compulsory nowadays during, and post, op and worn continuously, which are much lower tensile strength: maybe it's to avoid gangrene - there'd be a tale to tell, but better not.
2200M - well above the snowline, in a four hour blizzard, today - such fun.

Sir Hugh said...

gimmer - warning noted. Only just found this. The Mac had put in Junk !

I hope you've got some good photos of your adventures.

Andrea Wilkins said...

Great idea Conrad, although I'd recommend duct tape for a tougher seal. I wrap it around any toiletries that might leak, travelling around Thailand last year, my boyfriend made fun of me until he had a catastrophic shower gel explosion after a particularly long and sweaty train journey. He bought a roll the same day!

Andrea Wilkins @ Getaway Outdoors

Sir Hugh said...

Andrea Wilkins - Welcome to the blog - it's good to have a new commenter, especially from the other side of the world. Feel free to keep commenting.

I am a little intrigued to know how you came to my blog, and how that lead to a post from some time back.

There is a programme on Sky called Mythbusters where they test out urban myths, often ending in spectacular explosions, but they have done a whole lot on duct tape. They made a rope and abseiled down a cliff. They have also made a sailboat, covered an aeroplane, made a duct tape bridge amongst many other interesting ventures.